I'm not sure if social media is to blame for peoples tendency to make everything look glittered in gold or what but I am sick of it. Yes this world is and can be a beautiful place, but most times it is not (depending on how far down the rabbit hole you have gone). There are forces that have been here a long time to keep humanity in a cage. Mentally, physically and spiritually. Too often people are on autopilot to force kindness, happiness and being okay. It is hard for me to preach this lifestyle at this particular moment. Everything is not okay. There is a lot of fucked up shit happening in the world and holding yoga positions and crystals is not going to fix it. Thousands of whistleblowers have lost their lives and careers for people on the mass scale to get real information and people are still out here trusting the so-called "politicians" and media. If you are not out here doing your own research then I do not want to talk to you. I've come to realize that it takes navigating really dark situations to have a clear inner standing and way to see the light. This fairy tale lifestyle of love and light only is not real. Spirituality has become a trend and it truly makes me sick. What the hell is "woke"? Why is everyone wanting to be an expert or self-proclaimed guru these days on spirituality? A true conscious being knows that the test of life is always within self. Nobody has the absolute truth of anything. What is true for you is the evidence of the beliefs you have. One of the top notions of spirituality is to live in your truth. The issue is that a lot of people become "spiritual" and begin to pretend to be someone else! People create this illusion of themselves that they think fits the lifestyle. I am extremely frustrated. I have spent the last few years of my life being in an obsessive nature with respect to learning and self-development. I am very self-aware which has been a blessing and a curse. Something as simple as being intuitive has a downside. Intuition comes with empathy, meaning others can more easily control your energy. The antidote to this is of course, more self-work- and I will always care deeply about that. Running Moon Water + Honey has been a true test of my abilities and strength. I know God/Universe/Divine sees everything. I have always been heart-centered in running my operations, but I am tired. Everything has become a competition and desire to outshine the next person. I am tired of worrying if someones intentions towards me are genuine or not. My soul is tired of this human experience. I am beyond fed up and tired. I am tired of the fake love. I am tired of the love with conditions. I am tired of the non-existent love. I am tired of being goddamn tired. I pray everyday for the strength to keep going- I have a son who needs me more than anyone. He is my why. Yet I know incarnated to this particular time period to make an impact on a massive scale. I feel the forces always trying to stop me. A lot of us have goddess and god energy but keep running into low vibrational people who haven't yet done enough self-mastery work but try to stop others from living in their potential. I send all that negative energy back times 13. I don't look like what I've gone through. A lot of people are carrying worlds on their shoulders and invisible wounds on their backs. Nobody should be making any assumptions about me. If you see a smile on my face, know that it is well fucking deserved. I've done too much healing and evolving to be tipped over the edge on some goofy shit- but some days I do feel like I'm going insane. I am still healing myself, I'm still breaking generational curses, I am still working on my "shadows", I am not a finished masterpiece- healing the inner work NEVER stops. So anybody who claims they did the work- didn't do any work because the work never stops.
Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.